I went to see a movie by myself. I have done it before, I just knew it was something I needed to do. When I entered my twenties as a single girl, I made a promise to never not do something just because I was single. So, I went and I am so glad I did.
I saw "Old Fashioned."
It was an empty movie theater, Jesus, and me. I just love dates with Jesus. It was just what my heart needed so deeply. I was talking to my Mom a couple of nights ago about what Jesus has been doing in my heart and mind and what He has been asking of me the last couple of weeks, her response was simply- "It sounds like a set-up for growth." That was one of the first deep breathes of refreshing I took. And then, tonight, as I watched this movie, it wasn't me falling for Clay Lawson, even though it was hard not to be blown away by the human he is and the man he was choosing to be. Tonight was about something much deeper. I wasn't going for the romance elements or the "chick-flick" nature, I went because I felt my heart and hope was deflated.
Tonight, I walked into that movie theater with my hope nearly destroyed. I walked into that movie theater with my hope feeling like a deflated balloon. I walked into that movie theater with a heart fighting to stay open when everything inside me is screaming to shut down and walk away. I walked out of that movie theater with hope coursing through my veins. Hope to believe that I can experience a love story that goes beyond what this world creates. Hope to believe that my future husband is on this planet and that in God's timing, he will wholeheartedly pursue me. Hope to believe that God is a God of redemption and healing of wounds and pains of the past. It also stirred this craving to dig deeper into the Word.
It's interesting how the day after Valentines Day, I was texting with a dear friend and we were talking about how we both craved a love story beyond what this world defines. Her fellow and her are intentionally seeking that and it is breathtaking to hear their story. I am not in a hurry to get married or have a family, if God orchestrates a story and that comes about, I am all in. I'm not in a hurry, but….
I'm excited for the love story between my future husband and me. I don't know if I would have said that three-ish hours ago. I have hope- and husband, wherever you are, sharing life with you for the rest of our lives makes the journey worth it. Baby, I long to share life with you, but only with Him as our center and in His timing. See you soon then, husband.
One of the many amazing, incredibly, fantastic quotes in the movie that I loveeeee…
"Maybe love doesn't have to be perfect to be worth it."
It was a good night. *smile*
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